Hey guys.
This deployment has been really great. Thank G-d, the border has been mainly quiet and I have enjoyed hanging out with the guys, reading lots of books, working out and enjoying the incredible beauty of the Golan Heights.
I won't lie, sometimes, I got army depressed as the long boring days slipped into a routine. Sometimes I felt that I have had enough and its time to get out of here; all of my friends are getting married and working and here I am stuck in a rut. But most days I am glad that I have the ability to wear my uniform with pride, doing what I know is right and what is needed.
Soon, G-d willing, I will start three months of training. Afterwards will be my last deployment. I am approaching the home stretch. The years have turned into months and I won't lie by saying that I am looking forward eagerly to civilian life.
Nate
Thursday, January 21, 2016
Monday, November 16, 2015
Quick update
I am enjoying my deployment at the moment. The guys are good and I'm having fun. Nothing else is so new. A lot of people from my Garin are getting out of the army which is slightly depressing but awesome (at least for them).
Tuesday, October 13, 2015
אין לי ארץ אחרת גם אם אדמתי בוערת
Disclaimer: I usually use this blog just as a way to send quick updates to friends and family on my whereabouts and what I am up to. But this post is going to be political, something that I try to avoid in general but the past few weeks have gotten me so frustrated that I feel bottled up and this blog post is one way to let off the steam.
I'm frustrated. Over the past two weeks, my county has been subjected to a terror wave of car rammings, stabbing sprees, and shootings. People are dying simply because they are Jews. Forget occupation, economic grievances, and even the latest excuse of the rumor of Jewish prayer being allowed on the temple mount (as if it isn't already a disgrace that Jews aren't allowed on our holiest site so as to not offend Muslim sensibilities!). This is simply the latest episode of the Palestinian/ wider Arab world's inability to accept a Jewish presence in the Jewish homeland. It's part and parcel of the over one hundred year long conflict. But that isn't why I'm frustrated.
I'm furious over the misreporting and incredibly biased coverage of the world media. Coverage that portrays policemen defending themselves as aggressors. The media that in general does it's absolute best to portray Palestinians as perpetual victims- the same western condescension that views "Orientals" as subjects and not as actors responsible for the consequences of their own actions. But this flawed media coverage is nothing new and it's not why I'm angry.
I feel useless. I'm stationed up north watching another county tear itself apart in an endless civil war while I can't help out my fellow citizens in their own war. I feel useless as I worry about my friends and family as they go about their daily lives. But Israelis have always worried from the war of independence to the current day and my feeling of uselessness isn't why I'm frustrated.
I'm frustrated because when I made aliyah, I did so because of one overarching reason: only in Israel are Jews the masters of our own fate. Here in the experiment of Jewish sovereignty, we would shoulder the burdens of government, defence, etc and formulate policies. For the first time, however I feel frustrated because I feel that we all- from left wing to right wing- have nothing to say. There are no solutions or creative vision. What are we supposed to do to stop this terror?
The right and left throw out the old tired slogans but my hunch is that underneath all of the talk is a weary acceptance, or resignation to the current state of affairs. That's because there isn't anything to do- of course I don't mean that there aren't drastic security measures or policies we could take- I mean that I feel there is nothing we Jews can do as a sovereign state to change the fact that the Palestinian/wider Arab world reject Israel on principle. Therefore the reason I made aliyah, namely Jews being the masters of their own fate and solving their own problems, has been taken away from me. This is one problem that is out of our hands- we can't force their world to accept our sovereignty. Acceptance must come from within, it can't be forced upon ppl externally. And this is why I'm frustrated.
But just as I've written before about how the army is about coming to a middle ground between idealized expectations and reality; so too is aliyah. Just because there are problems that we can't solve doesn't mean we give up. I still have no regrets about moving here. I still feel -know- that Israel is the Jewish homeland, that Israel is the Jewish people's future and that a brighter future awaits us. I feel-know- that there is a vitality to life here, perhaps because of the uncertainty, and that living amongst one's people as a majority is simply more liberating than living as a minority, no matter how well integrated or protected.
So what to do? Fight against the terrorists while not losing our Jewish values and humanity. Work to make the country secure from attacks from within and without but also work to make it a better country. One with good economic opportunities, less racism, increased appreciation of our Jewish heritage, less cynicism and critique and more open to appreciating the great things this country does and offer.
As the title of this post states (taken from the famous Ehud Manor song) "I have no other land, even if my land is burning".
Hoping for quiet and peace.
Nathan
I'm frustrated. Over the past two weeks, my county has been subjected to a terror wave of car rammings, stabbing sprees, and shootings. People are dying simply because they are Jews. Forget occupation, economic grievances, and even the latest excuse of the rumor of Jewish prayer being allowed on the temple mount (as if it isn't already a disgrace that Jews aren't allowed on our holiest site so as to not offend Muslim sensibilities!). This is simply the latest episode of the Palestinian/ wider Arab world's inability to accept a Jewish presence in the Jewish homeland. It's part and parcel of the over one hundred year long conflict. But that isn't why I'm frustrated.
I'm furious over the misreporting and incredibly biased coverage of the world media. Coverage that portrays policemen defending themselves as aggressors. The media that in general does it's absolute best to portray Palestinians as perpetual victims- the same western condescension that views "Orientals" as subjects and not as actors responsible for the consequences of their own actions. But this flawed media coverage is nothing new and it's not why I'm angry.
I feel useless. I'm stationed up north watching another county tear itself apart in an endless civil war while I can't help out my fellow citizens in their own war. I feel useless as I worry about my friends and family as they go about their daily lives. But Israelis have always worried from the war of independence to the current day and my feeling of uselessness isn't why I'm frustrated.
I'm frustrated because when I made aliyah, I did so because of one overarching reason: only in Israel are Jews the masters of our own fate. Here in the experiment of Jewish sovereignty, we would shoulder the burdens of government, defence, etc and formulate policies. For the first time, however I feel frustrated because I feel that we all- from left wing to right wing- have nothing to say. There are no solutions or creative vision. What are we supposed to do to stop this terror?
The right and left throw out the old tired slogans but my hunch is that underneath all of the talk is a weary acceptance, or resignation to the current state of affairs. That's because there isn't anything to do- of course I don't mean that there aren't drastic security measures or policies we could take- I mean that I feel there is nothing we Jews can do as a sovereign state to change the fact that the Palestinian/wider Arab world reject Israel on principle. Therefore the reason I made aliyah, namely Jews being the masters of their own fate and solving their own problems, has been taken away from me. This is one problem that is out of our hands- we can't force their world to accept our sovereignty. Acceptance must come from within, it can't be forced upon ppl externally. And this is why I'm frustrated.
But just as I've written before about how the army is about coming to a middle ground between idealized expectations and reality; so too is aliyah. Just because there are problems that we can't solve doesn't mean we give up. I still have no regrets about moving here. I still feel -know- that Israel is the Jewish homeland, that Israel is the Jewish people's future and that a brighter future awaits us. I feel-know- that there is a vitality to life here, perhaps because of the uncertainty, and that living amongst one's people as a majority is simply more liberating than living as a minority, no matter how well integrated or protected.
So what to do? Fight against the terrorists while not losing our Jewish values and humanity. Work to make the country secure from attacks from within and without but also work to make it a better country. One with good economic opportunities, less racism, increased appreciation of our Jewish heritage, less cynicism and critique and more open to appreciating the great things this country does and offer.
As the title of this post states (taken from the famous Ehud Manor song) "I have no other land, even if my land is burning".
Hoping for quiet and peace.
Nathan
Friday, September 25, 2015
Back to Kav
Hey everyone,
I returned from my trip to the States on September 8th. I rejoined my guys in the Golan Heights and jumped right into the routine. This kav is much different from the previous one in the northern West Bank. There we interacted with the local population and were much more hands on. Here (not supposed to tell you exactly where!) we spend most of our time doing intelligence gathering. It is way more boring than our previous kav. I am okay with boring!
I have moved successfully into my new apartment. While I miss the kibbutz, there is something nice about having my own place and having to be an adult: dealing with bills, laundry, and groceries. At the beginning of my army service, I was happy to have the kibbutz as a crutch to avoid doing this stuff. But now as I am more settled, I actually enjoy it. I know, give it some time.
We are now in the middle of the holiday season and there is truly no place like Israel to be for it.
Until next time,
Nate
I returned from my trip to the States on September 8th. I rejoined my guys in the Golan Heights and jumped right into the routine. This kav is much different from the previous one in the northern West Bank. There we interacted with the local population and were much more hands on. Here (not supposed to tell you exactly where!) we spend most of our time doing intelligence gathering. It is way more boring than our previous kav. I am okay with boring!
I have moved successfully into my new apartment. While I miss the kibbutz, there is something nice about having my own place and having to be an adult: dealing with bills, laundry, and groceries. At the beginning of my army service, I was happy to have the kibbutz as a crutch to avoid doing this stuff. But now as I am more settled, I actually enjoy it. I know, give it some time.
We are now in the middle of the holiday season and there is truly no place like Israel to be for it.
Until next time,
Nate
Monday, August 24, 2015
NY
I just returned from a absolutely wonderful trip to NY. I spent time in Washington heights, the upper west side, the Einstein campus in the Bronx, and Westchester. I saw a bunch of friends from high school, college and of course family. It was great- though a very poignant reminder of all that I left behind when I made aliyah and joined the army. As I have written in this forum before, I don't miss America the country as much as I expected to, but I miss the friends and family terribly.
On Shabbat, I was in Einstein visiting a friend whose spouse is a student there. I was a biology major in Yeshiva University and as many YU pre-med students are enrolled in Einstein, I saw many of the guys that I studied with. They are third or fourth year students and about to start "real life" as residents. This fact lent a very surreal aspect to the entire weekend because had I taken the MCATS, I could very well have been one of the students there. I completed the same courses, achieved the same grades (more or less), and participated in scientific research in the summers. I really could have been living their lives now. Yet when I return to Israel in two weeks, my life will not be one of studying, tests, and applications but one of patrols, guard shifts, and sweaty uniforms. The contrast is simply vast.
I don't regret my choice, however, for a second. "Real life" will be waiting for me when I finish the army. Until then, I will do my service, and will do it proudly.
On Shabbat, I was in Einstein visiting a friend whose spouse is a student there. I was a biology major in Yeshiva University and as many YU pre-med students are enrolled in Einstein, I saw many of the guys that I studied with. They are third or fourth year students and about to start "real life" as residents. This fact lent a very surreal aspect to the entire weekend because had I taken the MCATS, I could very well have been one of the students there. I completed the same courses, achieved the same grades (more or less), and participated in scientific research in the summers. I really could have been living their lives now. Yet when I return to Israel in two weeks, my life will not be one of studying, tests, and applications but one of patrols, guard shifts, and sweaty uniforms. The contrast is simply vast.
I don't regret my choice, however, for a second. "Real life" will be waiting for me when I finish the army. Until then, I will do my service, and will do it proudly.
Wednesday, August 12, 2015
America for a month!
Hey everyone. I am writing this post from the great US of A!
I arrived two nights ago after a wonderful stopover in Frankfurt and already feel like I am back to being a citizen. It is funny how quickly one gets used to being a citizen and how slowly it takes one for to accustom oneself to the mindset of a soldier.
I am in America until September 8th and plan on spending time with my parents, dog, and playing lots of sports and biking around. I also am heading into NY next weekend to see friends.
In other news, I transferred all my stuff to my new apartment in givat shmuel before I flew. When I return, I will unpack everything in one go. I am very excited for this new stage.
N
I arrived two nights ago after a wonderful stopover in Frankfurt and already feel like I am back to being a citizen. It is funny how quickly one gets used to being a citizen and how slowly it takes one for to accustom oneself to the mindset of a soldier.
I am in America until September 8th and plan on spending time with my parents, dog, and playing lots of sports and biking around. I also am heading into NY next weekend to see friends.
In other news, I transferred all my stuff to my new apartment in givat shmuel before I flew. When I return, I will unpack everything in one go. I am very excited for this new stage.
N
Sunday, July 26, 2015
Quick update
Hey everyone.
My summer training is very quickly drawing to a close. We have two weeks left and then we are going to be deployed up north (can't say more than that for obvious reasons). However, as I have already mentioned, G-d willing, I will also fly home for a month once I get all the proper approvals from the various branches in the army that I need and in that case I might see some of you very soon.
There really isn't too much more to add at this point. Once I get to the new deployment I will let you know how that goes.
In terms of the guys and my unit, we have a new commander. He is a awesome young religious guy and super motivated. He is a mix between my first commander who was a very strict disciplinarian which turned people against him and the second who was very laid-back which quickly lost him respect among the guys. He does let the guys walk over him and at the same time he isn't out to get us. I am very pleased with him. The unit itself is very small at the moment, due to commanders leaving and different people going off to different courses. Hopefully in a few months time soldiers will start returning from their courses and commands and we will have more guys on the team.
For those who are fasting, have an meaningful and easy fast.
N
My summer training is very quickly drawing to a close. We have two weeks left and then we are going to be deployed up north (can't say more than that for obvious reasons). However, as I have already mentioned, G-d willing, I will also fly home for a month once I get all the proper approvals from the various branches in the army that I need and in that case I might see some of you very soon.
There really isn't too much more to add at this point. Once I get to the new deployment I will let you know how that goes.
In terms of the guys and my unit, we have a new commander. He is a awesome young religious guy and super motivated. He is a mix between my first commander who was a very strict disciplinarian which turned people against him and the second who was very laid-back which quickly lost him respect among the guys. He does let the guys walk over him and at the same time he isn't out to get us. I am very pleased with him. The unit itself is very small at the moment, due to commanders leaving and different people going off to different courses. Hopefully in a few months time soldiers will start returning from their courses and commands and we will have more guys on the team.
For those who are fasting, have an meaningful and easy fast.
N
Saturday, July 4, 2015
Israeli?
Hey guys. I am sitting here at 1 AM. Thanks to a malfunctioning washing machine and the sopping wet clothes that emerged from it, I am forced to keep myself awake for hours to wait as the drying machine valiantly struggles to dry my uniform.
The benefit from this unexpected late night is the opportunity to sit down and write a really detailed post. In terms of whats been happening with me lately, there isn't too much to report. Summer training is mainly fun. We get off practically every weekend, the atmosphere among the guys and commanders is for the main part very relaxed and aside from the hard weeks in the field, being on our base is actually quite pleasant.
As I have already wrote, personally I am getting ready on moving to my new apartment in TLV, psyching myself up for the imminent arrival of my sister on aliyah, and G-d willing, planning to be back in America for a month sometime this summer.
Thinking back to more than a year and a half ago when I was just beginning to draft into the IDF, its hard to imagine the ways I have grown and changed. Why all this reminiscing? Well because its 1:15 AM and what else I am supposed to do now?
Anyways, I have been thinking a lot lately about it. I am not sure why, perhaps it is because I have passed the halfway mark in my service. Perhaps it is because now all my discussions with my Garin have now switched from questions about training and whats happening in the army to post-army trip plans, work/study options, and dating life.
Somewhere, somehow along the line, I have become integrated. Become Israeli in nature and not just in name. Without paying attention to it, I have picked up on the little cues and begun to navigate the cultural landmines. Suddenly, I realize that sometimes I think in Hebrew and display the same dark cynical humor and inexplicable happiness that exist side to side in this paradoxical land.
When at the beginning of the whole aliyah and drafting process, the counselors and offices kept telling me that with time I would integrate and "everything will be okay" and "everything will work itself out", I didn't believe a word of it, now I do.
Now I understand my bank statements and cell phone bills in Hebrew, laugh at the right places in Israeli T.V. and know how to navigate the public transportation system in practically every major city in Israel.
The funny thing about this whole transformation if you will, or my changing identity, is that while I have changed, the people I interact with still relate to me in the same way as if I just stepped off the plane.
From the guys in the army, I still get the jokes about my accent and the same question of "why the hell are you here, bro?"
The bank tellers still explain things to me as if I have the intelligence of a second grader.
The taxi drivers still try to cheat me out of my money.
I know my experience isn't unique and is standard fare for an immigrant. I just find it interesting and most of the time amusing.
So no, I don't regret aliyah or joining the army as a combat soldier for a second. I would do it again. I have never been happier or more fulfilled than I am now. Yes, I miss 4th of July bbqs, Del's lemonade and the Narragansett bike path (only my RI readers will appreciate that), customer service, and watching the Pats, Sox and Celtics at normal hours.
The point or conclusion of all this long rant? Not really sure. I am just giving some expression to my changing self-awareness as I continue on.
Anyways, happy Independence Day America and hope to see you soon!
N
The benefit from this unexpected late night is the opportunity to sit down and write a really detailed post. In terms of whats been happening with me lately, there isn't too much to report. Summer training is mainly fun. We get off practically every weekend, the atmosphere among the guys and commanders is for the main part very relaxed and aside from the hard weeks in the field, being on our base is actually quite pleasant.
As I have already wrote, personally I am getting ready on moving to my new apartment in TLV, psyching myself up for the imminent arrival of my sister on aliyah, and G-d willing, planning to be back in America for a month sometime this summer.
Thinking back to more than a year and a half ago when I was just beginning to draft into the IDF, its hard to imagine the ways I have grown and changed. Why all this reminiscing? Well because its 1:15 AM and what else I am supposed to do now?
Anyways, I have been thinking a lot lately about it. I am not sure why, perhaps it is because I have passed the halfway mark in my service. Perhaps it is because now all my discussions with my Garin have now switched from questions about training and whats happening in the army to post-army trip plans, work/study options, and dating life.
Somewhere, somehow along the line, I have become integrated. Become Israeli in nature and not just in name. Without paying attention to it, I have picked up on the little cues and begun to navigate the cultural landmines. Suddenly, I realize that sometimes I think in Hebrew and display the same dark cynical humor and inexplicable happiness that exist side to side in this paradoxical land.
When at the beginning of the whole aliyah and drafting process, the counselors and offices kept telling me that with time I would integrate and "everything will be okay" and "everything will work itself out", I didn't believe a word of it, now I do.
Now I understand my bank statements and cell phone bills in Hebrew, laugh at the right places in Israeli T.V. and know how to navigate the public transportation system in practically every major city in Israel.
The funny thing about this whole transformation if you will, or my changing identity, is that while I have changed, the people I interact with still relate to me in the same way as if I just stepped off the plane.
From the guys in the army, I still get the jokes about my accent and the same question of "why the hell are you here, bro?"
The bank tellers still explain things to me as if I have the intelligence of a second grader.
The taxi drivers still try to cheat me out of my money.
I know my experience isn't unique and is standard fare for an immigrant. I just find it interesting and most of the time amusing.
So no, I don't regret aliyah or joining the army as a combat soldier for a second. I would do it again. I have never been happier or more fulfilled than I am now. Yes, I miss 4th of July bbqs, Del's lemonade and the Narragansett bike path (only my RI readers will appreciate that), customer service, and watching the Pats, Sox and Celtics at normal hours.
The point or conclusion of all this long rant? Not really sure. I am just giving some expression to my changing self-awareness as I continue on.
Anyways, happy Independence Day America and hope to see you soon!
N
Saturday, June 6, 2015
Summer training
Hey everyone. Summer training is here. Nothing too much to report. We are practicing the basics to remove the rust accumulated over our time on deployment. Lots of drills, exercises, working on gear. Its quite hot and the gear is heavy, but that is nothing new.
I am getting ready for some big changes in my personal life. I have decided to move off of kibbutz to an apartment in Tel Aviv (givat shmuel). I decided on this move because it is much better for me socially. In another very exciting development, my sister is making aliyah so now I will be able to see my sister all the time. I am very excited!
I am getting ready for some big changes in my personal life. I have decided to move off of kibbutz to an apartment in Tel Aviv (givat shmuel). I decided on this move because it is much better for me socially. In another very exciting development, my sister is making aliyah so now I will be able to see my sister all the time. I am very excited!
Friday, May 8, 2015
Leaving deployment and starting summer training
Hey guys!
Since I last left off, I had been in America enjoying seeing my family and taking a breather from the army. Well, I returned for about another two to three weeks in the army. Same old, same old: guard duty, patrols, and occasionally missions. Like I've mentioned before, I really enjoyed kav because in your free time, you decide what to do with it. Work out, phone friends and family, read lots of books that are on your reading list, drink coffee with the guys (minus the disgusting cigarettes that Israelis feel are required when drinking coffee), or sleep. Well all good things must come to an end, and this past week we finished our deployment in the northern West Bank separation barrier. I will miss the beautiful views we had there:
Anyways, we are now starting our summer training. It will be really, really hot because all our field maneuvers are in the Jordan river valley. This region, while stunning, is quite literally the lowest plain, altitude wise, in the world and is baked by the fierce sun. Luckily for me, I will not only do my training there, but I will do my training with my old friend the heavy and bulky machine gun.
One great benefit of the summer training, however, is that I get out for the vast majority of my weekends including getting out on Thursdays. Can you say beach and friends??
Furthermore, our base is back on our old training base, however, since I have finished training, I now live in the special section of the base that is set aside for us. The atmosphere there is magical. Everyone is walking around on t-shirts, shorts, and sandals. The paths are well tended and every three steps is another place for plushy furniture and places to make coffee. There is a huge lounge and decks for grilling. I guess after absolutely crushing us for an year and three months, there are some benefits to getting into a special unit. I have to say that my unit is really awesome, the feeling of brotherhood is very intense and everyone looks out for one another.
I don't have too much to add. As many of you know, the Israeli elections finished recently and a very unstable right wing government was formed. We'll see where Netanyahu will lead the country. My two cents is that the government will collapse again. If not, it will be very disappointing if the ultra-Orthodox parties succeed in overturning the legislature that would have forced them to draft into the army or national service. Its past time for a sea change in their society and to realize that Israel is their state as well and that protecting the Jewish people is a national burden that they as a segment of the Jewish nation are required to shoulder.
Until next time. עד מתי?
Since I last left off, I had been in America enjoying seeing my family and taking a breather from the army. Well, I returned for about another two to three weeks in the army. Same old, same old: guard duty, patrols, and occasionally missions. Like I've mentioned before, I really enjoyed kav because in your free time, you decide what to do with it. Work out, phone friends and family, read lots of books that are on your reading list, drink coffee with the guys (minus the disgusting cigarettes that Israelis feel are required when drinking coffee), or sleep. Well all good things must come to an end, and this past week we finished our deployment in the northern West Bank separation barrier. I will miss the beautiful views we had there:
Anyways, we are now starting our summer training. It will be really, really hot because all our field maneuvers are in the Jordan river valley. This region, while stunning, is quite literally the lowest plain, altitude wise, in the world and is baked by the fierce sun. Luckily for me, I will not only do my training there, but I will do my training with my old friend the heavy and bulky machine gun.
One great benefit of the summer training, however, is that I get out for the vast majority of my weekends including getting out on Thursdays. Can you say beach and friends??
Furthermore, our base is back on our old training base, however, since I have finished training, I now live in the special section of the base that is set aside for us. The atmosphere there is magical. Everyone is walking around on t-shirts, shorts, and sandals. The paths are well tended and every three steps is another place for plushy furniture and places to make coffee. There is a huge lounge and decks for grilling. I guess after absolutely crushing us for an year and three months, there are some benefits to getting into a special unit. I have to say that my unit is really awesome, the feeling of brotherhood is very intense and everyone looks out for one another.
I don't have too much to add. As many of you know, the Israeli elections finished recently and a very unstable right wing government was formed. We'll see where Netanyahu will lead the country. My two cents is that the government will collapse again. If not, it will be very disappointing if the ultra-Orthodox parties succeed in overturning the legislature that would have forced them to draft into the army or national service. Its past time for a sea change in their society and to realize that Israel is their state as well and that protecting the Jewish people is a national burden that they as a segment of the Jewish nation are required to shoulder.
Until next time. עד מתי?
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