Hey guys. I know, I know. I should have updated this blog a long time ago but I was just too busy/lazy.
There is so much to write about I don't quite know where to begin. I will begin with the operation.
In the end, my unit was called up to be a reinforcement group on the border. In general my unit didn't much of anything expect sit and play cards all day long during the operation. Due to the fact that I took a drivers course on a certain APC, however, I was used a lot for the last two weeks of the operation. Any time my commander or the commander a few ranks above him had to go into Gaza, I was the one who drove them in. I would drive in and out of Gaza with personnel, food, supplies etc.
One one hand it was a very interesting experience. I felt that I was doing a very small but important task in the overall mission. The supplies I brought to the fighters were crucial and I took commanders to important briefings. I witnessed some of the tunnel discovery/destruction first hand.
One the other hand it was very harrowing. I hate being stationary so being the driver of a slow moving target was terrifying. I know that rationally being behind the armor of an APC is safer, but as an infantry soldier you feel more safe being on the ground on your own two feet. While driving, all I did was try to focus on the mission and say Psalms; that way I didn't focus on my emotions at all. But it was hard to pretend that I wasn't scared or angry or tired or anxious. That is just the way it was. I was in the army for 35 straight days and that takes it toll on any human being but especially when there are nonstop sounds of bombs, missiles, tanks etc, heat, sand and tensions flaring. I am thankful that I didn't participate in any of the battles; that would have made life even more difficult so I am grateful to count my lucky blessing.
I also saw the destruction the air force, tanks and artillery visited on Gaza. Burnt out buildings, shells where homes used to stand. It was like being in a movie, except in real life. I don't feel guilty about what we did, we had no choice, but I absolutely empathize with the average citizens of Gaza, they are the ones that will have to pick up the fragments of their life.
The operation was tough also in terms of my relationship back home with my parents and sister. Every time I managed to get in touch with them, they were extremely worried about me and I had to be the one who comforted them about how I was safe and not to worry. I was very homesick. All the loving e-mails that friends and family sent and the food and toiletries that were donated by the people of Israel every day of the operation really helped lift my spirits and being with my guys was also helpful.
I don't really want to get into the politics of the operation. I want to focus on another aspect of the operation that I am just beginning to understand and internalize-the indisputable fact that Israel lives by the sword. We are encircled by enemies who pray for our destruction every day. G-d I wish it wasn't so, but Israelis grow up and realize that there will always be conflict here. It is a depressing fact but it explains so much. Why Israelis live in the moment- because every moment that you can sit on the beach, watch the beautiful sunset (and girls :) is a moment to be savored. Why we are so self-critical- because if we allow ourselves to become lax or unprepared, we pay dearly for our mistakes. It is a hard place to live, Israel, and it hardens you in return.
The operation also, quite naturally, aroused fiery sentiments in most Jewish people. When I would peruse Facebook I would see endless statuses from my Jewish friends. Some would post things like, Israel needs to go in deeper and conquer the strip or that Israel needs to act more restrained in regards to civilian casualties, etc.
Now I believe that every Jew should feel at home in Israel and that every Jew should feel entitled to his or her opinion on Israel. At the same time, however, when I would read these statuses they really angered me. Because with all due respect, the person calling for us to go deeper into the strip isn't the one who has to go and follow the order. I am. Israelis know that their cousins, fathers, sons, brothers, and friends are the ones who serve and fall in battle if that is the order. They know and experience what being under rocket fire is like. I think that people should truly try to stand in our shoes before telling us what we should or should not do.
Anyways, after the operation we returned to our course. I am enjoying the air conditioned classrooms and refreshing desert breeze during the night. The material is interesting and the guys are enjoying themselves. I am starting to think about my plans for the holidays which are upcoming.
Nate
